New Video: Christine Miserandino reads ‘The Spoon Theory’

 

You guys have been asking for this for a LONG time.

This is me reading “The spoon theory” live at a Lupus Symposium. This video is from the speaking appearance at the Piedmont, NC LFA on September 11, 2010. Thank you to them for having me, and to Stealth Awareness for making the video.

Please feel free to comment, share and subscribe on youtube; as well as share the video on facebook, twitter your blog or elsewhere.

I am honored to share it, I hope you enjoy it!

-Christine

©2021butyoudontlooksick.com
  • Donna

    That was a very sweet yet powerful presentation!  I wish that the people who do the transcribing would use a spell check, though!

  • Guest

    I usually try using budgeting daily $ as an example, but I think I like your spoons even better  🙂   I feel a tear slowly meandering down my cheek as I write this… not because I feel sad, but because I feel so incredibly grateful that someone else TRULY understands this concept… and now I don’t feel like I’m the ONLY one……(Thank You)

  • Ljuanita_2000

    Christine, 
    thank you for “reading” your spoon theory,  we lost one of our daughters to a few of these invisible diseases,( lupus for one) and just as you explained needing to decide which spoon to use (staying home to rest or going out with friends for a day) and what it would really cost. kept her home alone at her decision, and soon left her alone most of the time cause her friends didn’t understand, and being teens well you know they always want to go out, sorry, it breaks my heart thinking back.  thank you for sharing. I will be passing this onward too!  God Bless.

  • green sprout

    wonderful story. I hope to borrow this to help explain to others just how folks with  invisable illnesses get through their days. I have friends who just don’t “get it at all” maybe this will help them…   Hope you are doing well Christine the spoons you used to creat this will help soo many. THANK YOU

  • Helennorvill

    This sums it up for me, it’s so hard having an invisible illness, i’m at a stage where I am now letting people know how it effects my life, (((GENTLE HUGS))) to you all..x

  • Hbmccarren

    I have had lupus for 16 years (diagnosed) and CFS for 20 years.  Heck I had fibromyalgia before it had a name and I was told it is all in my head.  No it isn’t all in my head it is all over my body.  Anyway, I watched The Spoon Theory and finally learned a wonderful way to explain living with this disability.

  • wow this explains alot i wish my family and friends undrstood like this ……..gina

  • Zionztriumph

    I really am touched by this because I empathize with the spoon theory and how some people unaware of the day-to-day accomplishments and or failures living with disabling illnesses –for me Osteo & Rheumatoid Arthritis, Chronic Fibromyalgia, Degenerative bone disorder– can affect our mental, physical, and emotional drawer or box of spoons — Thanks Christine for sharing your spoon with me and may God bless you to have many more spoonfilled days. LaSonya

  • Caroline61590

    Well said!  My husband has Pulmonary Hypertension and I can totally relate to what you go through each and every day!  God Bless and stay strong!!! 

  • William Hawkins64

    So true I have been suffering with a bad back and knees for quite awhile but because it is not visible I am malingering..

  • Ckvaz

    This is so true, bought me to tears, well put. Thank you

  • CPfriend

    Thank you very much, with the help of your story I’ve finally realized, that with my new therapy I’m actually getting more spoons in a long run. It’s just that the exercise routines I have to follow still cost things like spending time with my friends or taking a walk. On the plus side every day it gets a little easier to be more normal.

  • Sonie

    thank you so much,now maybe I can explain my illness to others.
    May God bless you and give you extra spoons so you can keep sharing

  • lara

    Christine.. Thank you so much for the spoon theroy i way nt have lupus bt i have endometriosis and wen i heard about the theroy years bk wen one of my endo girls mentioned it it gave me a bit of hope xx
    so thank you once again xx
    love to all ye guys who suffer in silence x

  • Awww Very neat way to approach your illness. My 36 year old daughter also has Lupus and I could also see myself as well in your theory! I will pass this along to her!! Thank you and God bless you!

  • Diane P

    I suffer with Crones,,,anemia,and migraines. Also have anxiety,depression and exhaustion. I totally get this …wish I could get the rest of the people in my life to get this!,,,
    thanks Ill pass it along!

  • Suzy

    Thank you so much for sharing this. I have been searching for a variety of ways to try and explain living in severe urelenting chronic pain and illness to my closest family and friends. They just constantly do not understand and I am not expecting them to understand because without experiencing it they cannot but I wish that they understood that they can never understand. I am going to make little cards which I can hand out to my friends and family to try and explain a little bit about what my illness is and how it effects me 24/7. I am hoping to slightly adapt this theory to fit my illness. Thanks so much for sharing this encouragement!

  • I have read “The Spoon Theory”, many times.
    I have also shared this with many people,
    for this is my story too. The first time I read this
    I balled like a baby, “FINALLY somebody gets it”!!!
    Yet I felt so bad to know, that someone felt the same.
    I am very honored that you shared your
    video with us.To be able to see that technically…
    “You Don’t Look Sick” What a shame their are
    so many of us living like this everyday.
    Thank You for sharing your “Spoons” wtih me.
    I used a “Spoon” to be with you.

  • glennis tolman

    Thank you christine now even i understand my fb better, yes i do feel like this everyday but i could,nt put it in to words, now my family understand what im going through everyday and know it,s hard for me to be there all the time for them. Thank you so much. you take care.

  • Bee

    Thank you Christine, for this wonderful explanation of “Lupus” I have SLE, and it so difficult to explain Lupus to anyone. I try to explain my daily situation and I get this, “Oh here we go again look” I don’t even think my family understand the disease. I’m sure they think it is all in the head. I have had Lupus for 5 years, just after the diagnosis of Lupus, Breast Cancer hit, then Lupus wasn’t through. It destroyed my platelets, and now the Spleen had to go as now I have ITP. Having to take so much predisone for the lupus has caused compressed fractures of the spine.
    Lupus is so destructive. I have forward this spoon theory to everyone I know; so maybe it will help them to understand where we are each day with this verdict that has been given to us. I have learned when someone ask me how I am. it is easier just to say “I’m Here” and let it go. I wish the public could be more informed and educated on “Lupus”
    Thanks, Bee

  • Lois Buchanan

    I have Lupus, hashimotos, fibro, IBS, and others. This is such a perfect explanation of a day of anyone with any chronic disease that is not ‘visable’. It is very hard for people to understand illnesses they cannot see. …and we all hear ‘ bydls’! Have a wonderful, spoon filled day.

  • Tami

    What a great video. I never get tired of the spoon theory. Christine you have given me focus and the strength through the spoon theory to face each day.

  • Sarah Clary

    I wish everyone would take time out of their lives to watch this and listen your story. I am so amazed at how easily you explain this, I truly am blessed to be able to tell others about this and hopefully they will understand my illness and how it can affect me on a day to day basis. I have Crohn’s and when I was first diagnosed my boss at the time accused me of being on drugs because I was not functioning up to my usual standards. I am going to send this to him and hopefully he will understand better.
    Again my thanks to you.

  • Karon Shepherd

    Your talk was wonderful. I have TM and the Spoon Theory is told to my friends quite often, but to hear it told to me, like you did in your video, has brought tears to me eyes.

    Thankyou
    Karon

  • Sheila

    My wonderful daughter directed me to this link; this is an explanation I have used for years, minus the spoons, but I think using something a person can hold and actually LOSE progressively makes it so much more powerful. And I never thought about telling people they were special if I was spending time (and spoons, or whatever) on them, but what at first might seem a condescension is actually a really sweet and wonderful way to reinforce how important that person is!

    Clearly some tasks take a lot more energy/spoons than others (ie how did you even let her get away with a full work day!?!:) ) and they also need to take into account that you feel miserable and energy-deficient most of the time you’re strategizing and spending spoons.

    I so admire anyone who can get out there and make others better understand!

    Thank you!

  • Andi from NC

    One of my nursing instructors recommended we watch this video and I’m so glad she did! It gave me at least a peek into what your world is like. I’ll definitely be recommending this to others (including family members of patients that my need a better emotional understanding of chronic illness). Thanks so much for sharing this with others.

  • Janice

    Great job helping others to understand how chronic pain is dealt with on a day to day basis. I was diagnosed approximately fifteen years ago, when doctors wanted to say it was in your head. Prior to that I was a weight lifter, did aerobics, jazzercise, track and all of this came to an halt. I am fortunate that I have been able to work long hours; however; it’s like walking, a few more steps and you may hardly move for weeks. Thanks for helping those who are unaware.

  • Kw

    This is a great video! What a simple way to explain to people how it is to live with a chronic condition. I myself have Fibromyalgia, and it is truly hard to relate your everyday life to others who are well.

  • Hannah Warren

    My nana has Lupus and when i herd you read this it helped me understand what she goes through everyday. Now i know why somtimes she can’t come over. She always she’s tired or feels sick and now i know why. The spoon theory was the best idea ever!

  • Beth

    Thank you for putting this into such an easily understandable story. My father has yet to be diagnosed or treated effectivly for his maladies. He goes through the same choreography of his day every morning. Did he sleep, is he sore, does his back hurt what will he eat, can he even eat if he does anything in the morning will it zap all of the energy out of the rest of the day. Will he suffer for days because he just wanted to eat that meatball. Your spoon theory takes the personal things away so those you try to tell don’t try to fix every little thing as you tell them what is wrong. I think most of the time when someone who doesn’t look sick tries to tell others thier friends think that they can help but don’t realize that the best they can do is just be understanding. This story helps convey that. Thanks!

  • Alisson

    Christine,
    Thank you once again. As I and many others have said time and time again…your Spoon Theory has changed my life. It was so wonderful to hear you read it.
    Wishing you and Abundance of Spoons
    Alisson

  • Christine, thank you, thank you, thank you. Having been diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, CFS, BSF and Myoclonus collectively in the past three years (and waiting on my blood tests for Lupus, other things, etc.) I started seeing a therapist who turned me onto your spoon theory. I read it twice and now watched your beautiful reading of your story, too. I started to cry because like you said..finally, finally someone had a way of explaining it clearly. I miss my unlimited spoons so much but knowing I’m not alone in having to use my spoons wisely has made a difference. Your and angel and I wish you the best!

  • KERRIE

    THIS FITS SO,SO WELL FOR LYME DISEASE THAT IT MADE ME TEAR UP AS I WATCHED.
    I POSTED IT RIGHT AWAY TO MY FACE BOOK PAGE WITH A GOOD FEELING SOMEONE WILL HAVE A BETTER UNDERSTANDING OF MY DAY TO DAY LIFE .
    THANK YOU FOR A GREAT VIDEO=)

  • Catherine

    Thank you for your generousity and creativity. You explain your theory so well and it is relavant to my condition too. I have ME. I hope you are in good health and spirits at the moment

  • Melody

    I was there!!! I loved seeing you!

  • Sagan

    I have been in chronic pain since 2005 when I was 25 years old. I am so deeply grateful to you for helping create this allegory for explaining the frustration and challenge of being young and disabled by chronic pain. I have used your words to explain what I couldn’t even articulate for myself. I have directed people to your website when I couldn’t talk from the tears of frustration or pain. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

    Because your words are so important to me, and I plan on sharing this with just about everyone I know, I wanted to let you know I found a typo to correct if you desire. “Loose some along the way” should be lose. Please accept this as constructive feedback and not criticism. I value your work, words, and investment of spoons into making the world a better place.

    With admiration and deepest respect,
    ~Sagan

  • Denise Williams

    This is the same video I just found on another site, just shared it on my FB page!!! Great job Christine!
    Thanks for Sharing it!

  • Darlene

    Oh my goodness. You drove it home for me. I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia 10 years ago. I finally get it. I have spent most of this time in frustration, trying to live like a ‘healthy’ person… I need to accept that I have only so many spoons. From here on out, I will choose wisely and try to accept my limitations. I am gonna stop WASTING spoons… fighting for MORE spoons! In a way, it’s kind of a blessing. I will appreciate and learn to live with and love the limited spoons I already have. What a light-bulb moment! Thank you.

    Darlene

  • Brittany

    Omg, i absolutely love this theory. I don’t have lupus but i do have a lifelong disabilty of chronic pain. Multiple back surgeries. I plan on showing this to a lot of friends and family to maybe help them understand the struggles i go through daily. This has opened my eyes. I love this story!

  • Debora

    Thank you for sharing this. This is one of the best explanations I have ever heard, and I’m sure to share this with many.

    I have lupus, rh. arthritis, hashimoto’s thyroiditis, and a host of other ailments… SO hard to explain to people!

    Thank you again and happy holidays!

    Debora

  • alicia

    thank you for posting this. I do not have lupus but i have friends who do. I have scoliosis and and weakened abdominal muscles . This means I live every day in pain and varied versions of incontinence at 42. It means I want to learn to ski and snow board w my family, that I want to dance and run and jump but every day and every activity makes me wonder if I’ll have an accident or not be able to walk tomorrow. Thou I do not understand exactly what you describe I understand watching your life pass you by because you have decisions to make. Decisions that leave you out and make you sad and that people who love you, in my case my husband and kids, don’t understand what constant pain is and that not doing the dishes or having the perfect looking home doesn’t just mean you are lazy. Blessings and prayers to you and everyone out there dealing with anything like this.

  • grant granger

    christine , you have given me a-lot of courage to trudge on thru what life has to dish-out. health & happiness from my heart….gg

  • Juanita Buttell

    What a wonderful and inspirational video!!!! I’m so glad a friend of mine posted this on Facebook. I have Multiple Sclerosis (MS) and Fibromyalgia. I use to make a list of things I needed to do the next day, but I would never accomplish a fraction of that list, so I finally quit trying. I just get up and start my day just trying to do whatever small task I need to do, one thing at a time.

    Just standing and washing my face and ears, I have to sit back down, before I can do anything else, like shower, or get my breakfast first. I keep thinking “There’s no point in starting anything that will take more than 15 to 30 minutes, because I’ll have to sit down and rest my back, legs and knees before I can continue.

    I think I’ve gotten into a “rut”, so to speak, thinking “Why even try to start any household task, I can only stay with it for 15 to 30 minutes without resting. This video has inspired me to start “planning my spoons”, before I start using them. Now, if I can just convince my body follow through with this plan?!!!

    I’ve heard people say, or read in articles about “baby steps…” That’s how you begin something, if you want to continue with it. By the way, I usually use about 3 spoons just to shower and get ready. I had to resign from my job 2 years ago to go on disability. Unless I have a doctor appointment, I’m in no hurry to get ready. I take my time, because when I try to hurry, I end up hurting myself!!

    Thank you Christine for posting this video. Thank you to my friend, Laury for copying it from Christine and posting it on your Facebook Wall. God Bless you both for using how you cope with your illness to help others with their own illnesses!!!! 🙂

  • Sherri

    Thank you for sharing and helping ALL of us, both those of us who are sick and those that love us and want to understand.

  • Michelle Hooper

    Once again Christine…YOU NAILED IT!!! Great job!
    And thank you so much for a video of it! Sometimes it is so nice to ‘hear’ something and not have to ‘read’ it…It’s a spoon thing 🙂
    In fact, I wish I could get most of all of my fibro friendly sites in podcast but it just isn’t so….yet. Reading can be difficult sometimes…to listen to these stories while walking my dogs would be nice…inspirational…motivational…I also love to write, and I have tons to say…but I just don’t have the spoons…Maybe a little at a time…hmmm, there’s an idea:)
    Thanx again! This is a great video! I’m sharing it right now!
    Have a great weekend!

  • Vickie Foster

    Christine, Thank you for such a wonderful video. I have read it over and over, but to hear you say “THE SPOON THEORY” has touched my heart! What a great mission God has given you to help so many people. My heart is full..Vickie

  • Melissa

    Christine, Thank you so much for The Spoon Theory. Not only has it helped many understand their loved ones illnesses, but it has helped me to understand my own limits and how to plan my days out, as I was recently diagnosed with fibromyalgia.

    This video is great… It brought tears to my eyes.

    Oh and just like Jan, we here in Louisiana, eat french fries and gravy all the time… 🙂

    Lots of gentle hugs being sent your way…

    Melissa

  • Jan Koelsch

    Christine, This is such a potent video. A person can read or explain The Spoon Theory but seeing you and the presentation (which is great) just adds power of the information and personal experience that you are conveying.

    Wow! What a great video. It should go on YouTube and shared on Facebook Page.

    Great, excellent job well done. You are very poised. Your presentation is very effective.

    Oh, and in Kansas we eat french fries with gravy all the time. One of my favorite things, especially from the Sonic.

    Kudos to you, Girlfriend.

    Hugs,
    Jan

  • Dottie Balin

    Christine,

    Great Video ! You did an awesome job. I also liked the graphics that you added with the spoons. Sometimes when someone else reads “The Spoon Theory”, it makes a better impact than if they read it themselves. Thanks for sharing. By the way I love french fies and gravy. Happy Holidays !!!

    Love Dottie 🙂

  • Unicorn

    Wow! Fabtastic! Even though as a BYDLS spoonie I am very familia with the theory and how it came about, to see and hear you articulate it in person is magical. Thanks for sharing this : )