I’m Thankful He Doesn’t “Get It”
“Your cells react to bacteria and viruses differently than mine. You don’t get sick, I do. That’s also clear…We’re on the same curve, just on opposite ends.” Elijah Price, “Unbreakable.”
I want to introduce you to my brother Justin. He’s three years younger than me; same parents, same upbringing. We’ve been living together for the past five years (our youngest brother has been living at home with our parents or on his own). We have pretty different interests, but we also have enough in common to be friends. One thing that is not common, however, is our health.
He never gets sick, but if he does with something like a cold, he’s over it in a day or two. Usually his “sickness” is self inflicted from being out the night before. He’s an exercise science major amd he will graduate this May. Working out and eating healthy are hobbies to him. When he’s not at class, he’s at work or hanging out with friends, going out and about around town.
I get angry that my body doesn’t allow me to do the “normal” things he takes for granted. Of course I’ve adapted and tried to accept my limitations as best I can, but that doesn’t mean my anger isn’t there.
I’m also angry that he doesn’t get it.
He doesn’t understand what it’s like to be sick. What it’s like to be stuck inside on a beautiful day. What it’s like to give up a “good day” to simply get caught up on laundry or other chores. What it’s like to have friends only online. What it’s like to have no energy to shower. What it’s like to put on weight due to medications and being in too much pain to try to work it off, if that would even make a difference at all. What it’s like to simply wake up and hurt. What it’s like to see your dreams crushed, shattered, stomped on, eaten and spit out at every attempt to fulfill them, even the modified versions.
As angry as I am with his lack of understanding, I am also thankful that he doesn’t understand. He still has this naïve idea of what his future is going to be and that it‘s all planned out and ideal. I’m thankful that he’s been able to do everything he’s wanted to do thus far in life. I know that one day he will understand. Somehow, someway, life will throw him a curve ball that he isn’t ready for or expecting that will leave him wondering, “What happened? Why me?” On that day, I will be thankful that I have had the experiences that I’ve had to allow me to offer understanding, compassion and empathy to my brother.
Article written by staff writer, Sonja Peterson
Sonja is a cat mom with endometriosis and fibromyalgia. She also had a hysterectomy for adenomyosis. She blogs about her experiences at The Mud and the Lotus www.mudandlotus.com
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