Sick Humor: The top ten worst suggestions commonly given to someone with a chronic illness

 

Sometimes you just gotta have a sense of humor!


The top ten worst suggestions commonly given to someone with a chronic illness:
1)Have you tried holistic options? (many. I’ll bring it back up with my doctor on my next visit, thanks.)
2) Could it be your stress? (My opinion is, it is my illness. I’ll bring it up with my doctor though, thanks.)
3) Could it have to do with the altitude? (I’ll bring it up with my doctor…thanks.)
4) I read in {insert any generic magazine here} about a new medication. Have you heard about it? (I was on it when it came out 17 years ago. but I’ll bring it up with my doctor. thank you.)
5) Have you thought about being in a trial study? (I’ll ask my doctor. thanks?)
6) WOW. If I were you, I don’t know what I would do. I might just kill myself. (Thanks?)
7) Have they found what is causing the problem? (no. my doctor is an idiot. I’ll remind him, thanks!)
8) Have you tried hypnosis? (I’m still sick, but when the phone rings I bark like a dog.)
9) Have you googled your illness? (….no! thanks!)
10 Have you ever thought you were getting sick because you haven’t wrapped your house in aluminum foil because, you know, the aliens have been bugging our houses for the past 30 years and in some cases, making people really sick. I read on…..gee I lost the web site. but it’s true! I heard it from Sally’s cousin’s sister-in- law. And then every time you use deodorant you would think you would be warding off these bugging rays, but it still makes it worse, so you are not being pro-active to your health by wearing that deodorant. I can’t believe you! If you wanted to get better you would stop wearing deodorant..(voice gets fainter and fainter the further you just walk away.) THANKS!!!!!!!!!!
Article written by Amy-Beth Maran , © 2007 butyoudontlooksick.com

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  • Good excuse for not being around…LOVE True Blood and cannot wait for the new season 🙂

  • BEn

    How about, “That doesn’t sound so bad. I get that too sometimes. I don’t see why it causes you so much problems.” Uhhh… I have it all the time. There is a bit of a difference…

  • Vicki Corlett

    I totally adore this site. I feel like I’ve finally found a real “home”.

    I’m laughing so hard at some of these; I think I’ve heard just about all of them in some form or another, too.

    I went to a GI specialist a few years back. I think that if I hadn’t been so surprised at hearing this load of crap from him, I would’ve told him off before walking out. As it was I walked out and filed a formal complaint against the idiot. He looked at my medications and asked “Who gave you all this crap?” He told me that I was “quite a package, aren’t you?” He basically told me I needed to find “inner peace” and I wouldn’t be having all these problems and yes, I got the “all in my head” routine the whole time he’s ordering a laundry list of invasive tests and telling me I need to lose weight, too. If I ever run into this doctor again, I think I’ll smack him.

    I’ve gotten the “you have to deal with whatever it is that’s in your past that’s causing this, then you’ll be okay.”

    I’ve gotten the you don’t have enough faith or there’s got to be sin in your life crap from christians, too. I ignore those.

    I do get out and volunteer when I can… I love what I do and it does help me feel well as long as I don’t over do it! (I just found out I’ve been nominated for volunteer of the year, too! WooHoo!)

    I have a husband, two teens, two cats and a dog and I’m working on a bachelor’s degree in college. I do have a life, I just have to live mine around Fibro and PCOS.

  • Annette Hollenbush

    My personal fave – (overheard) Oh, Annette has the vapors again, the whole world has to stop. Hahaha. Or the timeless – “You know, a good man is all you need to get you out of your rut.” *sigh*

  • Kimberly Farrell

    Just found this site…I’m cracking up and cringing at the same time! I love well meaning people but…it’s a good thing that sarcasm is my 2nd language!

    Jeanette, I just want to tell you that I am one Christian who doesn’t think that your “heathen ways” have made you sick! How hateful of those so called Christians! *sigh* I’m sorry they’ve made you feel badly.

    :gentle hugs: everyone!

  • Amelia

    Paul – I am SOOO stealing your ‘you don’t look stupid’ line.

    A few of my faves:

    “You’re making yourself sick(er) by thinking about it.”

    “Oh, yea, I get that too. Everyone does.” – oh, really? this one makes me want to slap people.

    “But you’re so outgoing, fun, young (37), I can’t believe you’re disabled.”

    “Go vegan and your MS will be cured.” SO not kidding – my own sister!

    “You have too much time on your hands.”

    thank you all for these – i am so thankful i found this site. 🙂

  • paul

    When someone says to me” You don’t look sick.” I reply ” You don’t look stupid.”…..and that often sets the stage for further converse of one form or another.

  • Janet

    My favorite things to hear are “Maybe you should stop drinking diet soda” “You obviously need more exercise” “Maybe you are depressed” and “you are probably just sleeping too much”
    My favorite response comes from Dr House “It is idiopathic,
    we are idiots because we can’t figure it out”

  • Am I allowed to mention medications that have helped? After suffering for 25 years with fibromyalgia I started on 5 mg of Abilify about 6 months ago.. It has turned my life around. The best way to explain it was how I went from sleeping 16 hours a day to sleeping 6. Any other suggestions out there?

  • ALana Richards

    The 3rd doctor I consulted told me ” You need a check up, from the neck up”( His exact words) He told me I was stressed over my child’s health issues and it was manifesting in chronic pain/fatigue. ( I had been sick for about 8 years before my child was even born)

    I’ve been told I was stressed, depressed, making it up, exaggerating. You name it. I had a total hip replacement at the age of 38 due to EDS, did I make that up too? ( I didn’t know it was EDS till later) When they finally diagnosed me with EDS, fibromayalgia, sjogrens and ( probably) lupus, I was actually relieved. It was nice to know I wasn’t crazy!

    IF I could feel better by doing something simple, I WOULD!!!!!!!

  • Tiffany

    This website is FANTASTIC!!! Never have I felt more like myself. What I mean is, I’ve been trying to be ‘normal’ for so long that I forgot to mention I FEEL LIKE CRAP!!! And all you lovely ladies (at least there doesn’t seem to be any men on this board) know exactly what I mean when I say that. Not ‘I’m having a bad day’ or ‘my hair looks crap day’ actually ‘I feel like I may die today if I get worse day’…So, in getting that rant out of the way, let me add that the worst thing I hear is ‘try and exercise cos that’s going to make you feel better’. I think what rheumy was trying to say was…”I don’t know how you feel cos I don’t have fm or lupus…but you sure could lose some pounds there!” Gee, thanks, like my self esteem needed that beating. It’s not like my whirling social life is going to be affected by my bloated stomach and shuffling legs. Don’t mind the needle like pain searing through my bones or the fatigue that just screams LAY DOWN!!!! Hope that’s not too…ummm…down??? xxxx

  • rroberto

    i bring this up as a person who is– as much as possible — active in my congregation, but i believe there are jokes in heaven too

    as woody allen said in his great early film ‘love and death’ —

    ‘if god is testing us, why doesn’t he just give us a ‘wriiten’ ?

    that’s the best response to the inevitable suggestion about your illness being ‘divinely given’ to you for your ‘benefit’

    anyone who claims to know what god ‘thinks’ about everything and why god does what god does actually knows nothing about god, faith or walking in another person’s shoes

  • Kimberly Czarnota

    My friend says “You need to stop going to that doctor, she’s trying to make you think something serious is wrong with you, and you are starting to believe it.”
    Really? The doctor I’ve been going to for 6 months made me imagine the pain, and sickness I’ve had for 10 years. Right!
    Or the doctors that say you’re too young to have MS. I’m 30.

  • Nancy Gale

    This is too cool! I’ve gotten “Did something happen in your childhood?” I’ve had Bi-Lateral thoracic outlet syndrome, fibro and arthritis in my ankle cause of a car crash in high school which left me with no cartilege. My sister actually thought this was hereditory and tried to pump info out of me every time we talked . I thought it was out of concern, then she said a week later she had it! That made me laugh my ass off! No tests etc. She just thinks getting a SSD check and not working is great! She’s also a seeker if you know what I mean, wink wink! Now I don’t speak to her or my niece I got tired of hearing “We’re tired of hearing you complain, you’re on your own faker.” Well sour grapes when you can’t get the GOOD life of having RSD huh?! Drama queens need not apply! Pain and spasms have already taken up all openings! They can send that robot to Mars, remotely send pics with data about water samples in that dirt, when the Hell are they gonna figure out what cures these things for us? Or have they already and the drug companies won’t release that cause of the tremendous loss of income to themselves? That’s what I think! Have as wonderful a day as you can! Smile if u can because none of us looks good crying all the time:)

  • Mary

    It seems like we’ve all had to deal with condescending doctors and unhelpful, but good intentioned friends…and I know that being positive is not what any of you want from me right now, but at least we HAVE people that care enough to make ignorant comments!

    My step brother has muscular dystrophy, so I always get “think about ___! Do you hear him complaining? it could always be worse!”

    It’s frustrating, Yes. But there is some truth to their incessant urges to eat better/exercise/do yoga etc. etc. It makes me irate in that moment, but later I realize that even though it may not fix things or even get me out of bed the next day, it DOES make a difference. Everything I do makes some kind difference even if it feels insignificant at the time. It’s so easy to get frustrated and stop trying and we all have to be careful not to let ourselves get too beaten down. There is no such thing as a medicine (at least in my case) that will fix everything either. And in my experience doctors aren’t any better and don’t even necessarily have good intentions! Plus, even if we had the best doctors in the world that knew everything there was to know about us, they couldn’t fix it either if we didn’t step up and do our part at the same time.

    All I’m saying is that chronic illnesses are hard on everyone involved and we should all remember (myself included) not to give them such a hard time when they unsuccessfully try to make us feel better. It’s not their fault they can’t understand. I had my break down yesterday (I’ve been really sick for about 8 months now with no signs of it letting up anytime soon) so this is probably the guilt talking.

    Anyway, to everyone else out there who is also suffering: there’s nothing anyone can say. It sucks. Period. Hopefully it will let up at least a little one day soon. Good luck and best wishes to all of you.

  • Maureen, I’m so glad you mentioned the cancer thing. I did have cancer, and I can tell you it was a whole lot easier dealing with it than my fibromyalgia. At least with cancer, you can do something about it. Not to mention the acollades from everyone around you. The people I tell about fibro say, “oh, I’m tired too, maybe I have fibromyalgia.”

  • Brittany

    My favorite….
    When getting registered at the hospital, or a new doctors office, or even at an old doctors office they will ask what medical condition you have. When I answer Pseudo Obstruction Disease, Osteoporosis and Depression, they follow up with… “Is that all?” Ummmmm you try living with Pseudo Obstruction, which caused the osteoporosis and who wouldn’t be depressed with all that… “That’s all”??? Are you serious? Isn’t that enough? Or am I not sick enough for you? Should I add on some more diseases? Would that make you actually give a darn about me?

  • Jo Ann

    I am at the point that when anyone offers me any comments or cures similar to others mentioned on this page that “Ignorance is bliss!! Isn’t it??”.

  • Candi

    Liz, My sister has the same problem. Drives her up a wall.
    The ones I get most often are of the “it’s all in your head”, or “If you were a stronger person,…” variety. I’ve got to say, the “God only gives you what you can handle” speech is the worst. Which can I handle? the depression, or the idiot ‘helpers’. Thanks so much for this site, It’s good to be able to laugh and rant about my illnesses with others.

  • Barbara

    “you’re just not trying hard enough.”

    *The people at church “lay hands” on you and when you don’t get better it’s because you aren’t a good enough Christian, you must not be worthy of God’s healing love. I tried to pray this all away, really I did. And now, I’ve lost a community that was important in my life, because some holier than thou hocus- pocus types think they have an ordered right to judge me because they show up at church on Sunday.

    *A friend asks how you are and you answer (minimizing, always minimizing lest you sound like a complainer, and you can never fully explain, can you?) about life & its limitations with 24/7 chronic pain for twelve years & its affects on every fiber of your being-
    while in the back of your mind you want to scream to them the
    whole l o n g play-by-play ordeal- and she says “well yeah, but it’s not a quality of life issue, right?”. Are you kidding?

    *Yoga. You seriously think I don’t already do those ‘exercises’ every day after having had a spinal fusion, and live with
    degenerative discs, stenosis, spondylolisthesis, osteoarthris? I don’t show up at a studio to do them because some days I can’t get out of bed, and I can no longer drive.

    *Massage. Puh-lease. I have irreversible damage to my back,
    neck, arms, hands, legs, feet. Massage might make me feel better, but then, it might not…let’s be realistic here & don’t get
    your hopes up.

    *oops, yup, I just can’t tell you my phone number right now because sometimes pain can be all-consuming and zaps my memory, sorry to inconvenience you so terribly. Give me a minute and I can tell you every phone number I’ve ever had, the date of my first kiss, and the Capitol of every state. No, I don’t
    have altzheimer’s and I’m not high on painkillers.

    Why is it always my fault when a treatment doesn’t work? Do you Blame cancer patients, people with MS, ALS or paraplegics for their
    illnesses too?

    Great web site & blogs. I just found this site today & appreciate it so very much…it’s nice to not be alone.

  • Adrienne

    I get told that I’ve gained weight by eating all the wrong foods! Which is pretty funny since I don’t eat a whole lot because:
    1. am allergic to wheat, soy, carrots, celery, corn
    2. have no appetite to speak of – food makes me nauseaus most of the time
    3. side effects of the medication (Lyrica, Cesamet, Mobicox, Effexor) causes weight gain!

    My “loving” extended family responded when I told them I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia on top of the Lupus? “Well why not? You have everything else!”

    Thanks soooo much for your loving support – ever thought of writing sympathy cards?

  • Maureen

    Thanks everyone, you made me feel less alone.
    I get “at least its not cancer” Which I understand is probably true. But, cancer is a more excepted diagnosis “oh! she has CANCER” and has massive funding for research unlike most autoimmune diseases. I’m not making light of people with cancer but still, it seems like a pretty odd thing to say to someone looking forward to a lifetime of illness that may not kill me, just makes me feel like crap.

  • Bren

    I love this site…we can say what we feel and every one feels the same thing (PAIN)! I’ve heard all of these to no end. Lately when someone is telling me the “Solution” to lupus, ra, fibromyalgia, depression, raynard’s, etc.; all i hear is “blah, blah, blah, blah, blah”! Sincerely, Just Tired!

  • Selena

    I love it! I have to share this gem. My wonderfully concerned and organic vermonty friends were so insistant that I see a holistic DR. they paid the $175 for me to go to this loveable general practitioner.
    I finally gave in and went after many a lecture about eating ALL organic $$$$$$ hello, and after hearing that if I drank vinegar with the mother everyday it might cure my Polycythemia Vera (blood disorder in the Leukemia Family).
    I went, she listened and agreed that she wasn’t a hemoc and couldn’t help me.
    The best suggestion was from another artsy friend, now I lived in AZ and lived and worked among many native Americans so, the suggestion was that I should go live in a teepee with a Shaman. Someone they heard of had a tumor and when they came back from this teepee experience, the tumor was gone!
    I love it and I stopped talking about my illness.

  • Lisa Glass

    I have an even bigger problem. I am bi-polar, so nobody listens to me when they hear that. And I get treated like my IQ is around a 5 y.o.’s. A Doctor even desribed me as a 39 year old bi-polar patient, not anything else. So, no one really believes me about Lupus or fibro. “Exercise”-well that kills me for days.
    “Lose weight”- well, I hurt when I was 50 pounds lighter. So, now what genius?
    I am tired of people telling me this isn’t a progressive disease. Really? Why do I hurt more now, then 10 yrs. ago?? That’s right! I’m Bi Polar!!! It’s all in my head!

  • Liz

    You’ve talked yourself into it, just get over it.

    It’s all in your head, just get over it.

    Try a Gluten Free, Vegan diet, that’ll be better to help you get over it quicker.

    You really don’t need all those tablets, just get over it.

    Come on, you’ve got to be kidding!!!!
    My Chronic Illness is real, unlike your imaginary Medical Knowledge

  • Mag

    Krista, sometimes people don’t realize how ignorant they are….arthritis is not the same as RA and fibro is not in your head. Google it idiot!!!!!!!!!!!!! How about “take a nap and you’ll feel better. I agree, a simple I’m sorry and is there anything I can do for you is much more welcome

  • Erin

    …It’s always a PLEASURE to hear this one…stay positive!
    HA! WOW & thank you for your wonderful advice. I’ll try that.
    Stay positive…Yup. All time fav!

    …Maybe your just depressed. That’s it DING DING DING. …Or I’m just bloody SICK!!!
    AND BTW…WHO wouldn’t be a bit saddened by the fact that their health has plummeted to an all time low and they can no longer even consider doing half of the things they once dreamed of? IDknow? Just sayin’

    exercise comes in 2nd for me:)
    -it’s ALWAYS either of these two suggestions.
    “You should try exercising”..it’s like telling someone whose on life support to excerise…(which is truly how i feel most of the time) Utterly lifeless like I should be hooked up to an IV. Exercise is great WHEN and IF possible (and only in small doses). YUP…”real exercise” like the kind i envision the givers of advice giving… ummm NOT going to help me but make things worse! But what normal person can relate to suffering a severe CRASH for several months? …I’m thinking,NOt tOO many.

    AND furthermore, to all you advice givers who think they know what is like to live with a life altering, debilitating illness. Keep your insightful recommendations to yourself…I do what I can do & to the best of my ability whenever I can. (This includes exercise) but yeah thanks for the tip.

  • Krista

    I am laughing – thank you I needed it- i have heard all the above over the past 10 years and tonight my husband came up with a new one. “They must be misdiagnosing you. You can’t have all these things wrong with you.” “By the way what’s for dinner?” lol.. I was diagnosed with Lupus, RA and Sojern’s for quite a while then last year Alopecia areata universalis this was a little hard to deal with but i kept telling myself it could be worse. Well you guessed it two months ago i was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. My rhuematologist has just reffered me to a specialist that deals with Lupus paitents and I am a little leary of even going for fear they may add some other illness to my long list. My hisband believes if I go to this specialist they will be able to fix me up just fine and I will not be in pain any more and life can go back to normal. Up to this point I felt i could deal with everything as i was still managing to work and pay the morgage. So Thank you for posting this-I really needed to feel the smile on my face and know that other people get just plain stupid advice from well meaning friends, loved ones and co-workers. I guess people just have to say something to feel like they are helping. I just wish once someone would say I am sorry- is there anything i can do to make your day a little easier. I am waiting and holding out hope that I will hear it but until I do- I will continue to look for things that make me laugh or smile as this post did.

  • Syler Womack

    “You just need to get out more and get your mind off of it. Have you thought about volunteer work?”

    I b’lieve I’m gonna slap somebody…

  • Alexia

    One more… “You’re so YOUNG (38). Wait ’till you’re my age – then you’ll know tired!”

  • Alexia

    “You look great”. (That one’s the WORST)

  • Alexia

    “I heard on talk radio the other day that cinnamon and rosemary are great for that”. Stupid me. If I only knew how easy it was!

    “Are you feeling better yet?” Nope. Still feel like $**t. I think that’s what “chronic” means. Silence…

  • Ilyssa Monda

    My all time favorite! Ilyssa, it’s all in your head! Yes, that’s right, the pain is all in your head.

  • Teresa Brown

    All above comments are soooo right!! I have had many said to me including ” Well are you taking anything for these problems ?” Dohh ! I was referred to a psychiatrist (by my now ex GP) for symptoms ‘all in the mind’ that proved to be EPILEPSY from scar tissue after having a stroke. GP did not even tell said psychiatrist that I’d had a stroke only that I seemed to think I had a problem.
    I have Rheumatoid Arthritis, Osteo Arthritis, Fibromyalgia – which took a very very long time to diagnose and yes I cried mainly because what I was suffering from had now actually got a name. I have diagnosed Angina, the chest pains were quite bad I, however, was told by my GP to jump around a little to see if it got worse but not too much as it may give me a heart attack. A locum Dr sent me to see a heart specialist and could not believe what GP had said.
    I take loads of meds and my consultant is great, now, but the journey here was long and hard. I find the more you know about your illness the better informed you can be when talking to the medics although it does not help dealing with dozey people who think they have the answer to all your problems. ( have you thought of taking wine vinegar ?—It really works ha O YES ! )

  • Jean Alston

    My favorite was always: “I know, I hurt too – but I just work through my pain and it goes away. You should try it.”

    Or “If you’re tired, just keep on pushing and you’ll get your second wind.”

  • Kathy FlorCruz

    1.Dr. suggests I lose weight, when I’m 60 lbs lighter than before I had spinal fusion failure & 2 fractured screws-
    2. Dr.s flat out tell you that they will not give you the meds you need to help in an ER crisis because “it could stop your heart”-even though you’ve been on these meds for over 6 years.
    3. Dr.s experiment with all kinds of new meds coming out while you are suffering & try the old antidepressant routine as if the broken screws & failed instrumentation in your spine are causing the intractable pain.
    4. Dr.s & receptionists giving major attitude especially when you actually KNOW what you are talking about &
    still treat you like a drug seeker-& suggest that maybe I need rehab if I can’t wait 3 months for an appointment.
    5.Friends & family act like they know that these drugs MUST be getting you high & THAT’S why you want them.
    6. Insurance companies determine how many meds at a times the pharmacists can dispense-regardless of the doctors instructions.
    7. Pharmacists who make moral judgement calls & say they don’t have the meds you need, & you know damned well they do or don’t by the excuses they give because you’ve heard it all before.
    8. Ortho/any pain doctors office who books you for a consult after you have fully explained your’e chronic pain needs-then refuse to write a script because “that’s not the answer”. BUT OFFER NO OTHER OPTION. {They then bill you & the insurance several hundreds of dollars for NOT HELPING you.}
    9. Being treated like dirt by medical personell from EMT’s to ER nurses who demand you move & change & whatever regardless of your pain level for the doctors exam-which consists of NOTHING but a rejection or a short script.
    10. Being called a “bounce” because you have had no luck finding a pain doctor & are forced to the ER.
    11. Being prejudged by medical staff who have seen those blasted viral medical records that are full of errors & omissions & refuse to help you BECAUSE SOMEONE ELSE SCREWED UP transcribing them or the doctor/staff have covered up the real situation that occurred.
    12. Being told by a doctor in any situation that “No doctor is going to help you anywhere, anytime EVER. And also says “Pharmacies don’t run out of medications!”
    13. Suggestions to see a shrink, or a chiropractor or god, or some other doctor who had already been seen or even contributed to your problem.
    14. Suggesting ANYTHING but what you know will work -especially when the doctor withholds a diagnosis a condition that has developed, because no one wants to try to fix what disabled you in the first place- a bad surgery on a fabricated diagnosis.
    15. And I’ll quit here because the saga will continue- “Get yourself a TENS machine.”

  • Kimberly St.Onge

    Yeah Ok ..now i’m laughing my ass off literally!!! Try to tell the medical world, law world or MY family/Friends that Narcolepsy and Cataplexy even exists as a physical Neuro disease not MENTAL condition when you fall flat on your face, slur ur speech/stumble around, or ALL of your senses suddenly “pop” and you have a narc halluination (not like a psycho one) or somebody wakes you up suddenly and u look and act wasted for a few!!! U get caught sleep driving or cook in the middle of the night!!! Then TRY to INSIST NOT to be taken to the ER bcause #1 U have to explain it to THEM and they STILL don’t “get” it and u truly do look and sound nuts ( they ask u what u want them to do in the ER about it) #2 they will suffocate u if they cant get ur pulse or detect breathing w/ mouth to mouth and you cant talk or move to protest BUT ur flipping in sleep paralasis mode ( CATAPLECTICS NEED AN AUDITORY PULSE OXOMETER TO DETECT VITAL SIGNS RIGHT,,,not one ER in detroit area has one BTW!!!!!) and know they are gonna kill ya LOL #3 I ALWAYS get a cardio, psych, or infection related admission even AFTER I bitch like a lunatic I have cataplexy related to narcolepsy and they will list chronic pain or some other weird diagnosis on ur release papers reagardless…CAN THEY GOOGLE???? #4 they have NO CLUE about a radical US patented gastic bypass surgery I had and regular dosing and mixtures of meds have OD’ed me three times in past vs. being suicidal #5 they could give a shit what u want/say anyway #6 the police will assume EVERY time ur ex calls for a “welfare check” ur just wasted because u cant talk or think straight from a fear induced cataplexy attack and although u show them the paperwork they ship u to the ER anyway ARRRRUUUGGGGHHHHHHHH now I make them come back n pick me up too!!! #7 When will people STOP assuming that we have’nt done all of that and WAY more….duh?? #8 When people avoid you because they are afraid of your illness “happening” at their witnesss!!! I have had all 10 listed suggestions and beyond here love the “u must be on something one”…I will say STRESS does make it worse because of the pure ignornance and lack of even considering something THEY don’t tell you themselves… excercise helps EVERYONE…depression results because of the ignorance and your suffering …. DUH! These rare conditions r a bitch to say the least and GOD forbid u end up with one like lupus, fibro or cataplexy or whoever knows what else is up and coming BUT I laughed so hard at this because its sooooooo TRUE n beyond!!! Talk to other people in your sitch and fight the medical diagnosis until you feel like it “fits” for u all the way. STAND UP FOR YOURSELF…nobody else will! I’m a bitch in the ER and at the dr’s now, and I don’t care if they think so or not. I TRY to remember people mean well but THEY forget to LISTEN to you!! NO MORE BLOOD DRAWS AND GRUELING TESTS PLEASE N THANKS!!! Just love em where they are at …I havent asked anyone persoanlly in my family or friends to “fix” me!

  • Jeanette

    LOL yeah. The holistic medicine “Why didn’t you tell me you were sick, I sell this tea that cures cancer” or from the doctors rececptionist “I’d rather die than have a colostomy”.
    My soon to be ex husband told me all I needed was to get out there and exercise, that will fix my parastomal hernia. (while it was the two jobs I was working while he worked 4 days a week that caused it)
    Don’t get me started on the christians who blame my illness on my heathen ways. Yep, I deserve everything I get.
    Yep, it’s no wonder I’m bitter and cynical at times.
    People just don’t get it.

  • Teresa Cook

    Hi Suzy, I’m new here also, believe me I understand everything your saying! I feel the same way. I have lupus and fibromyalgia.
    Good Luck sometimes it takes awhile…

  • Sandy Jenkins

    Here’s my favorite: Maybe you’re just depressed. People with pain are usually just depressed. (In other words, it’s all in my head.)

  • Suzy Kemp

    Hi ! I am a new “Spoonie”. Bit on the shy side!
    I have got Lupus, Undiagnosed..I thought my Consultant had confirmed it, back in March, last year. But all this time on, and she hasn’t!! My Rhumatologist only this week tells me that, It is not just lupus..but also Fibromyalgia. God Did I cry! they are very simmilar, they often go together.
    I had never heard the word “Lupus”..The Wolf. I have had this whole
    & Part Body, deep pain for 4 years now.. that I can remember? I have many, of the symptoms that you all have, SLE. I know and feel inside me. 100% that I have both of these, Chronic Illnesses…I just wish that it would come out in my Blood! So that it can be diagnosed, once and for all. Sorry ..Having frustration Issues, I sleep badly at night, so Dr put me on Amitriptiline, 10mg. now I am waking up at “Silly o’clock in the morning’s”, going back to bed still tierd. waking up at, “Half the day Gone!” 3-4pm….Arrrrgh!!!! Suzy. can any one ot there help! Please! xx

  • Gina McIver

    “You must have some unconfessed sin or God would heal you.”

  • Donna Twichell

    How about (from a physical therpist) All you need id to lose the extra 90 pounds you carry around….. ” I explained to him that there are a LOT of fat peOple WITHOUT lupus, sjogren’s, etc. AND there are a LOT of people who are thin who have lupus, sjoogren’s, etc. It might HELP, sure, but’s it’s not a cure- or a reason. (SO MO!)

  • and “God only gives you what you can handle….”

  • helen macdonald

    My favorite is “excercise is what will fix you up”! Try walking several miles a day! Oh Yeah!

  • Ann

    From my late brother: “God doesn’t give you across that you cannot bear…I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.”.

  • KiminAK

    You forgot… “What do you think you are supposed to learn from this?”

  • Nicola

    I am sitting on my own laughing so much, I’ve had so many of those suggestions made to me by well meaning friends.

  • hahaha

    That made me smile 🙂

    Thank you!

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