Sick Humor: The top ten worst suggestions commonly given to someone with a chronic illness

 

Sometimes you just gotta have a sense of humor!


The top ten worst suggestions commonly given to someone with a chronic illness:
1)Have you tried holistic options? (many. I’ll bring it back up with my doctor on my next visit, thanks.)
2) Could it be your stress? (My opinion is, it is my illness. I’ll bring it up with my doctor though, thanks.)
3) Could it have to do with the altitude? (I’ll bring it up with my doctor…thanks.)
4) I read in {insert any generic magazine here} about a new medication. Have you heard about it? (I was on it when it came out 17 years ago. but I’ll bring it up with my doctor. thank you.)
5) Have you thought about being in a trial study? (I’ll ask my doctor. thanks?)
6) WOW. If I were you, I don’t know what I would do. I might just kill myself. (Thanks?)
7) Have they found what is causing the problem? (no. my doctor is an idiot. I’ll remind him, thanks!)
8) Have you tried hypnosis? (I’m still sick, but when the phone rings I bark like a dog.)
9) Have you googled your illness? (….no! thanks!)
10 Have you ever thought you were getting sick because you haven’t wrapped your house in aluminum foil because, you know, the aliens have been bugging our houses for the past 30 years and in some cases, making people really sick. I read on…..gee I lost the web site. but it’s true! I heard it from Sally’s cousin’s sister-in- law. And then every time you use deodorant you would think you would be warding off these bugging rays, but it still makes it worse, so you are not being pro-active to your health by wearing that deodorant. I can’t believe you! If you wanted to get better you would stop wearing deodorant..(voice gets fainter and fainter the further you just walk away.) THANKS!!!!!!!!!!
Article written by Amy-Beth Maran , © 2007 butyoudontlooksick.com

← 
Newer Comments  →
  • Cerial4

    I have M.E/C.F.S. People at work are always saying to me ‘I’m so tired I think I’ve got that thing you’ve got’ Yeah right!

  • Monique

    “The most bizzare suggestion I ever got was that I ought to eat raw dog meat and that would definitely cure my Cystic Fibrosis. Ew! And I’m a vegetarian too!”
    Oh yeah –and I once got suggested to eat pigeon meat when I was trying to conceive, that it’d help, and vegetarian here too!!
    ..and I got told to lose weight too, and I did lost 130 pounds, but some still say that to me, not realizing its only skin on bones…

  • Beth

    This was truly a laugh! Like others, I’ve heard them so many times. The one about “just lose some weight” seems to be a real cure-all. My own former doc kept trying to put me on anti-depressants until I pointed out that I really doubt they would cause my brain fog to lift, my eyebrows to grow back in and to help me get unconstipated! It was an uphill fight for months to get the right tests and medication.
    I admit tho that I have been guilty of passing along medical articles – I hope no one takes offenses at that. You never know when there will be a tidbit of new info in one!
    Now, if I could only find a dentist who doesn’t think my toothache is due to my weight…and an ear dr who doesn’t think the tinnitus is due to my weight… and perhaps even a OBGYN who thinks my fibroids and cysts deserve treatment, just like thinner people… I haven’t found any of that yet, but surely do hope to before the lack of proper treatments do me in!

  • Diane

    I have found that laughing until tears roll down my cheeks and saying something like ” you are so bleaping stupid” cuts down on the thoughtless remarks.
    Last time my doctor told me to go for walks I asked if that wouldn’t just cause my joints to break down faster & cause more pain. ( I have fibro, osteoarthritis and Ostoeporosis). I have to give him credit, he admitted that weightbearing exercise probably wouldn’t help me. Ya think?

  • Ann

    Too true… Someone could write a book about this one.

  • wendy

    This isn’t really a “suggestion”, just an example of a stupid comment I get:
    “Oh yeah, I have that too. I had a cold last week and I’m still really tired.”
    (CFS, years of undiagnosed balance/headache/respiratory problems)

  • Wendy

    I get: “I don’t know how you keep going. I couldn’t.”
    What keeps me going is the memory of the the day I tried to pull the blankets over my head and stay in bed forever. But eventually I had to get up and pee…
    I keep going because time keeps going.

  • Erika

    That made me laugh which isn’t the greatest thing right now! But still, it’s funny:) I love it when people say:
    Are you eating enough?
    You should gain weight, you would feel better.
    You would feel better if you got out more.

  • Thanks so much for the laughs – I def. think laughter is (one of) the best medicines Mine is not uncommon ” you should get out more”. and you are taking me when?

  • gerri S.

    After almost 20 years of dealing with Lyme Encephalitis and its leftover effects – I too, have heard them all; go for a walk – you just need to get out – you just need to rest – you need to lose weight.etc etc. The best one was when I went into Clinical depression – you just need shock treatments – so and so had them 30 years ago and she’s been fine since then!

  • REL

    “Well if you didn’t sleep all day you’d feel better!”
    “You need to move around more, that’s all”
    “You’re taking too many medicines. They’re causing all your problems. Stop taking your medicines and you’ll be fine”
    “Well, my friend’s cousin has (insert completely unrelated illness here), and she does this and it really helps so if you wanted to get better you’d try this too.”
    “It’s because you’re fat, just lose some weight by exercising more and you’ll be fine” – I actually got this one from a DOCTOR before I was diagnosed with MG, ignoring the fact that I’d had symptoms since I was a skinny little seven year old.
    “Just ignore it and it’ll go away” (Twelve years and counting, nothing yet..)
    “Forget about the whole disease thing, just go live your life” – I think that one might be the best yet – and from another doctor no less!

  • L. Kinney

    Can relate to all of this, ever since I have been diagnosed with lupus. I like it when people compare their nonsensical diseases or complaints to lupus – “oh, I know what that’s like” or the really brave soul who loves to remind us of “karma – you know what goes around, comes around”. I just pity them.

  • RedHairAngel

    My favorite one is “I think you need to stop questioning the doctors and start doing what they tell you. (Ok never mind that I have been told by a half a dozen doctors the pain swelling and bathroom trips are all in my head!!!) — RedHairAngel

  • Sandie Jones

    OMG… You all are toooooo funny!!! To say that I have heard them all is redundant, but soooo true!!!
    Here’s mine: On a required visit to my Rheumy, I get ready to leave and he asks me… “Tell me, why do you WANT something to be wrong with you?” (HUH??? Oh, yeah, because it’s the IN thing to be sick… Right, ya quack?!!! I have FM, CMP, DDD and Spinal & Cervical Stenosis)

  • Lynette McMurray

    Thank you. This post and some of the comments made me laugh out loud because I could relate to so many of them. It’s nice to know I’m not alone even though it doesn’t solve any of the problems.

  • Moma Medienta

    This is hilarious! I hear all of these all the time including from my mother who has the same problems (OA, FMS, Degen. Disk Disease). What I really love are those people who try to tell me that my migraine is “just a headache”. Sure….and childbirth is just menstrual cramps!

  • Beverly Michel

    My personal favorite…the first doctor I went to wrote on a note pad the entire time I expressed my symptoms, when I finished talking he handed me a script for xanex, patted me on the head and said, “humor me, try this for three months, everyone exhibits these symptoms during the winter”! Note to self…find another doctor!

  • Ruth Brown

    “Have you tried the blood type diet? My mum tried it for her arthritis and it’s made her feel so much better.” According to the blood type diet book, my blood group shouldn’t get sarcoidosis, but somehow that’s what I’ve got! Doesn’t really make me want to try the diet. Besides, I’m too tired to cook separate meals for myself & my husband because we’re 2 different blood types with 2 different chronic diseases.

  • Lilly

    This is from my neuro…
    “If you would stop taking your pain meds you wouldn’t be in pain so much!”
    (He blames my pain on rebound headaches from pain meds.)I say, “If i wasn’t in pain I wouldn’t have taken pain meds to begin with! And how does that explain the pain I have when I haven’t taken pain meds in days?”
    I was also told I was schizophrenic and put on seriously bad meds that made me want to commit suicide. A year later docs found out I wasn’t schizo, I was having seizures!
    And to my headaches,”It’s all in your head.” Yes, that is the problem… the pain is in my head!
    I hear the lose weight and excercise and eat right stuff all the time too and I’m 115 pounds, a perfect weight for me. I cook everything fresh to avoid MSG. Of course, no one believes you when you tell them you already do those things.
    And if God answered everyone’s prayers to be healed, no one would be sick.

  • Amy

    And then there’s the wel-meaning, “Have you prayed about it?”
    Don’t get me wrong, God and prayer are the only thing keeping me going sometimes, but hello, like I’m not gonna pray about it when I get diagnosed with a chronic illness. God never promised life would be rosey.

  • angie

    Thanks so much everyone. Reading all of your comments helps me to know I’m not alone.

  • amanda

    my dad once told me”I just have to want to do things”. so THAT’S where i’ve gone wrong, i’ve lost contact with friends, had to stop doing hobbies and lost my social life because I don’t WANT to do the things I enjoyed! I sure as hell don’t want to drag myself into work (had to reduce to parttime although couldn’t afford to)and collapse exhausted each day to bring some money in so I miss out cuz I have no energy left to do anything else but I do that.

  • chrissy

    That is so funny! I love the one from the husband about “everyone has pain”…I have people say that to me all the time. “It can’t be that bad” is my favorite. How would you know? B/C I am overweight I always get “You need to loose weight and excercise.” Great Idea! I never thought of that before! Maybe the fact that I can’t walk without excruciating pain has something to do with why I can’t exercise! Let me go put on my walking shoes…
    (FMS, CFS, RA, Deg. bone disease)

  • Melisa Allen

    Thank you so much!! This really made my laugh!!!! I hear these ALLLLLL the time and want to strangle people. Knowing you hear it and hearing some new ones was refreshing!!!

  • carrie

    go for a walk that will cure your bipolar..wow i didnt realise it was that simple.
    you need more exercise. go for a run…if i ran on my hypermobile joints i would collapse from exhaustion and be bedridden with pain for 3 days.
    jesus will heal you…actually im happy being blind. i dont want to be healed thank you.
    aloe vera juice…co this will completly replace the missing link in my collagen, reformat the electrical signals in my brain causein my bipolar as well as fixing the faulty gene, and make my eyes pop out and working ones will just grow right in their place.

  • shay

    “Do you not just feel like throwing yourself out the window?!” (Umm seeing as I live in a bungalow… it just seems a bit pointless?)
    And from my doctor: “You just need some exercise. Are you SURE you’re not just depressed?” (I have ME/CFS … if I could do exercise then there wouldn’t be a problem!!)

  • Pat

    MY favorite, from my husband of 17 years, who I thought understood the problems that I have…”Everybody has pain and is tired…you JUST HAVE TO PUSH YOURSELF AND WORK THROUGH IT!” I was diagnosed with FMS and CFS 35 years ago.

  • DJ

    My favorite one was from a doctor…I had just spent 6 months being wrung through the mill on every test they had (well over $100,000 in med bills), he come’s into the room and says…”Ithink it’s all in your head, if you would stop thinking you are sick you’ll get better.”

  • Debbie

    Forgot the other one from friends…the “I’d kill myself if I were you!” one. It always makes me feel better lol

  • Debbie

    I get the “eat better and exercise, lose weight” everyday from my mother. If these people only had a clue. I try to laugh at their ignorance and this article has helped me do so, ty! (SLE, CFS, Gastroparesis, APS, CPS and more)

  • melissa

    I have one! When I told my mother that I was diagnosed with RA 3 years ago, her response was, “well, that’s what happens when you get old.” umm…by the way, I’m 40.

  • Stephanie

    My favorite? “Be sure you drink a lot of water!”
    If only I had thought of that! I’m not sick – I’ve just been sooooooooo thirsty for 2 years. Wait’ll I tell my Doctor! They’re gonna feel pretty dumb when I reveal your genious plot to drown my illness! (golly shucks thanks pal!)

  • Shazinoz

    I get the it’s your diet (I am not a big fan of fruit or veggies – I think it is the texture) you need to eat better, or more fruit and Veggies etc. (Yeah sure this will miraculously repair my genes and make me completely healthy again… Thanx) (I have EDS – Genetic and more)…

  • Pearce

    I have CFS and i am getting so sick of when i explain to people what i have saying “well do you take vitamins” (ummmmm only about handful a day but i could always add more for good measure!)

  • Meghan

    This stuff is too funny. I can totally relate. I get the exercise and eatting better ones all the time. What I love is that the “healthy” people giving all this “great” advice usually have worse live styles then myself.

  • Ke-Yana Drake

    I get the exercising one all the time. It’s like, yeah, sure buddy, I can go out for a run… I can barely walk because of sciatic and back pain, and often I don’t have the energy to cook let alone go outside, but gee thanks for your helpful comment.

  • Krystal

    When I was dx with depression as a child: “Think happy thoughts!”
    When I was dx with Schizophrenia: “It’s all in your head, your dr doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

  • Hannah Ledsom

    Hee Hee, I thought I was the only one who got similar comments. but the worst one I ever got was from a bully of a teacher, lets call her Mrs Rolyat, and when ever I collapsed and went cyanotic ( blue) ( I have EDS, chiari and POTS, to name a few) she would shake me and say to stop wasting her time!, thankfully the PE teacher saw her and stopped her, then he performed CPR. I still have nightmares about her. By the way the comment on the hypnosis one really made me laugh :).

  • Tammy

    I have heard just about all of them (except for the dog food one). That person that suggested that should have to eat the dog food! I have FMS, CFS, UCTD, (I could go on, but won’t), and my parents aren’t in the best of health, we live together to make it easier on all of us, and I was told that I needed to move out so that I would have less stress!! The best part that “great advice” was by a Doctor!!

  • Crystal

    I laughed so hard at the hypnosis comment that I was crying. I always heard the comments about stress and working through the pain.

  • Alyson

    I rested two days before we went out to lunch. I knew it would wipe me out for another two days afterward. But…”Isn’t this nice?” she asked. “See, all you need is a reason to get up and out!”

  • Amy Hyatte

    hahaha…I got a kick outta these because I hear all of these almost daily…well except for the dog one that is just gross…the one I hear the most is you need to get out and get some excercise and are you eatting enough veggies?(uhh I would love to just get up and run around for a hour or so everyday and most thing I eat is veggies cause anything heavy makes me nausious)

  • Danielle Fulton

    All you need is some fresh air (yeah, because standing out in 90 degree weather makes me feel so much better)

  • Suzanne

    Maybe it’s your blood sugar, just eat smaller meals more often and you’ll be fine.

  • sarah

    I get… maybe you should eat different. Ya know when you put bad things in your body bad things happen to your body.
    Or
    Try to concentrate on not vomiting maybe that will make you not vomit.
    (I have gastroparesis and rumination syndrome. all i do is vomit)

  • sarah

    no no no my personal favorite is….. if you just wouldnt let it run your live you would feel better you know pushing your self.. youll just make it worse if you contiue sitting there…

  • Caroline Witte

    No, the MOST common one: If you would just get more excersise you would feel SO much better!! Why don’t you join my gym? I have a great personal trainer….

  • Lois

    The most bizzare suggestion I ever got was that I ought to eat raw dog meat and that would definitely cure my Cystic Fibrosis. Ew! And I’m a vegetarian too!

  • Teresa Norman

    You have forgotten the one women hear the most… “you just have to lose some weight” Well, if I felt like I could drag my pain filled body somewhere other than from the couch to the bathroom, I might consider it!

  • Pam~garfield2late

    11) So-and-so (insert name/relation) started doing these exercises and got better so you should do them and get better too. (uhhh… thanks)

←  
Newer Comments  →