I recently discovered my passion in life. I also bought a giant poster for my dorm that says “PASSION” on the bottom, just to remind myself of why I am living. If you are not passionate about life, then you are not living at all.
I used to think that having a chronic illness was simply a burden I had to bear; it was in no way a positive addition to my life. I prevented me from living a “normal” life. Too many days were spent inside and too many nights were spent crying. I looked at my friends and felt jealousy towards them because they did not have to worry about a nearby bathroom, or making a long drive without stopping. What a beautiful thing!

It was my love and passion for running that changed my pessimistic outlook into optimism. The best thing about being well and healthy is being able to get out there and run for hours. One day, on one of my more stressful school days and contemplative runs to the gym, it suddenly hit me; why should I waste away my days wishing I had someone else’s health? It was pointless wishful thinking. Here I was, healthy as ever, yet I was still worrying about flaring up again. It got me thinking about all my friends with Crohn’s and/or Ulcerative Colitis. Some of them have never experienced a flare, while others can never seem to get out of one. Why wish for perfection when it is not even attainable? It was on that run that I realized two things about myself. I was never meant to be perfect; I was meant to have this disease. The second thing I realized was that running was how I would keep my positive outlook. I would run for a cure, and never look back.
It was at that moment that my whole life fell into place. All those years spent running in the shadow of someone else finally made sense. I was never meant to succeed in running on a school team. I was meant to run for a cure. If I had not gotten terribly sick that one horrible summer, I would have never learned to appreciate such a disgusting part about my life. Every negative thing in my life led me up to this moment of realization. I did have a purpose on this planet, and my purpose was to contribute passion to a cure.
I recently volunteered to be a mentor for team “Take Challenge” this summer. “Take Challenge” is a group of individuals dedicated to running for a cure. This is the first year it is in San Diego, and I am very excited about it. Our first team race is a half marathon through the beautiful Wine Country of California. Every penny raised will go strictly to Crohn’s and Colitis Research. Running this race is my way of telling my condition that it does not control me, but I control it.
I know we all come from various backgrounds, privileges, and conditions of our own. We all share everyday struggles with unique outcomes. What I want you to gain from reading this is a sense of passion. Be passionate about life. If you are unable to go out and run 13 miles with me, then find a passion that you body allows you to adopt. Everyone needs something they care about, and sometimes the passion you discover may be what allows you to see the good things in your life. Finding someone you love is the best feeling to me. I want everyone who reads this to experience a self-realization such as my own. Life is too short to not make your dreams come true, and nothing, physical or mental, can stand in your way.
(If anyone is interested in team “Take Challenge”, please comment below, or contact us).
Article written by: Caitlyn Pilkington ©2008 butyoudontlooksick.com
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What is your passion? Comment below and share.